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Nov 2, 2026 · Theme of the week: Anger

Mental Monday - Edition 44

Path to Becoming
Mental monday
“The greatest remedy for anger is delay.” - Seneca, Book II.
Theme of the week: Anger
Has someone ever said something that made you angry and left you wanting to defend yourself immediately? Suddenly, you’re replaying their words and thinking about what to say back.
That happened to me recently when someone I knew distantly sent me a hateful message online. They disagreed with my content, which was fine, but also questioned my character and intentions.
My first instinct was to defend myself. Prove them wrong.
Thoughts about my past and worries about how I was being perceived started circling in my mind.
I felt angry, so I knew I needed to pause
I looked around and brought my attention back to where I actually was: sitting in a meeting in a hockey office, with my future wife in front of me
That pause gave my initial emotions a chance to settle.
I had fought through so much to be in that room. And here I was, considering giving my attention to a hate message while something deeply meaningful was happening right in front of me.
I thought about what engaging could cost me. I could spend the weekend worrying about my image or arguing with someone who might never understand me.
The people around me deserved my presence. Even if I convinced this person to see me differently, what would that add to the moment we were sharing?
In the end, I left the message unanswered and returned my attention to the room.
You may have experienced that same pull during a disagreement with someone you love or after a comment at work. When we feel misunderstood, defending ourselves can feel urgent. We want the other person to recognize our intentions and acknowledge that their words hurt.
But that feeling of urgency doesn’t always mean we need to respond immediately.
That is where Seneca’s reminder can help. A pause gives us time to notice what we’re feeling and consider what we want to happen next.
This week, when you feel that urge to react, give yourself a moment. Put down your phone or step away from the conversation if you can. Notice where you are and what needs your attention. Then ask yourself:
What would my response serve, and what might it cost?
Sometimes, speaking up is necessary. You may need to clarify a misunderstanding or address something hurtful. Giving yourself time will still help you choose words you’ll still stand by later.
Other times, you may decide that the exchange deserves no more of your attention.
Stay strong, even when you are not. It’s okay, you are not alone.
Love always,
Michael Argyrides
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